Saturday, 7 September 2013


Over the past couple of months, I have started and left unfinished three or four blog updates.
I think that as previously mentioned what we experience now is "similar" to what has gone before or is not suitable for posting on the blog.

This has therefore brought me to the decision that I should close the blog, or at least suspend it indefinitely
I hope you have enjoyed reading it, I have enjoyed the writing

and of  course the Bar the man walked into is still open 6 days a week!!


Thursday, 18 July 2013

French Life, Posting Pooh

I have thought long and hard as to how to tell this story. ( see, first line and I have made a subtle excuse for not updating the blog more often)
As a man of a certain age here in France, the French health service wishes to check that amongst other things that I have nothing in my bowels that I shouldn't have ( not that they say what is and isn't acceptable!)
There is a picture opportunity here but I am not going to lower myself!

The means of doing this is that they send you a letter together with a box of tricks.  I ignored the first one as I felt that I wasn't up to the task but then nothing if not persistent they sent me another one.
Now how do I put this delicately?

I was to do a collection of droppings, three times in a row and send them back to them in the post.
I have many times though that my postbox was full of shite but I had never been asked to add to this before.

I plucked up the courage to start the process and opened the kit. This contains 3 what look like hammocks but a bit smaller and for collecting rather than reposing. Then there were three  cardboard spades, the use of which you can guess, and finally a piece of card with three windows on which to spread the goodies.

And then the time came, I spread my hammock making sure they stuck to the sides, sat down,set my aim and fired.  Not sure what we would have done had we had the squatter type WC so favoured in France. Then came a little spade work and a spreadsheet unlike any I have used in the past.
Three times on the trots ( sorry!) I hit the bullseye and then with the card complete to a yell of BINGO, I proceeded to seal the contents, waited until after dark and popped to the post box with my letter hoping nobody would see what I was posting .

I can only imagine the scene, and perhaps smell, at the other end as hundreds of samples arrive daily from all over France. Let's hope they never have a postal strike especially in warm times.

Thankfully about 10 days later a further letter arrived telling me that I was clear

Friday, 8 March 2013

Thursday, 14 February 2013


I haven't written anything on the blog for ages and I have been asked why not. Is it because nothing happens? Is it because things happen but are not suitable for telling the world or is it just you're a lazy sod and can't be bothered.

Well I guess it's some and some. It is said that as you get older either in age or  experience, time seems to go   quicker as you experience less new things. As they say, been there done that. So as we have now been at the bar for a couple of years, we do have less new experiences which are worthy of writing about.

And yes things do happen that can't be put on the blog, perhaps I will write a book when I retire.  I have some great stories, the 75 year old lady telling us about the singles club, two ladies discussing a change of career prostitution!!! and many more.

And yes, thirdly, I am a lazy sod!

We have just returned from our annual holidays, always taken in January to fit in with our partners. The fish and chip van takes a break in January and February and our quizzes are once a month so we had "window of opportunity"  for two or three weeks break.

It was lovely that so many of our regulars made a special trip to the bar in the few days before we went away, to wish us a "bonne vacance"
It seems people locally enjoy the atmosphere of the bar.

Sadly whilst we were away one of our French regulars passed away. He was here just about every day and was well known both in the village and to our British customers. He is most probably in Heaven now, nursing a €1 glass of chilled red wine and grunting " parlez francais"  to all around regardless of nationality.

One last thing, it has been commented that there is a continuing theme of ladies and toilets on the blog, well just to set the record straight......