The Idea

We made the decision. On our anniversary as it happens we decided we would emigrate. We have agreed that we will buy a cafe bar in France, or at least we would do our utmost, having to sell up in the UK to finance it.
we had considered it earlier in the year when we realised that a small business in France even if it just about broke even would be a way of getting into French life pre retirement. It was a way of joining the social security/ healthcare system which is vital. We travelled to France at the end of August 09 to go and have a look. It wasnt really a fair view. We took two hours in a traffic jam to get from the A1 to the Dartford bridge. I think we had made up our minds that the answer would be yes before we even got on the ferry

So what makes us want to commit to a cafe life? I for one can’t be bothered to jump through the hoops to get a new job, phone interviews, face to face interviews, tests, more bloody tests, more interviews, give me an example of when you did this, when you did that. Experience is ok if you can put it into words, actions not required, and if you fit the “culture”. I think the final straw was being told by a failing company, with low turnover, high costs and severe problems at least in the stores I visited, that I was “too results driven”

How crap can it be when to secure a 6 month contract on a low basic salary with no car, you are asked to do a CV, then an internet maths test based on store sales and profitability. Profiling followed as did an hour competency interview, an hour profit and loss exercise and a communication exercise. Get through this, through to the final interview, another hour another exercise and then “too results driven”

I enjoyed watching the demise of Threshers.
Still they had it coming. Of course the results won’t come if they want someone who “fits their culture” of dirty, untidy, poorly organised stores with low stock as they can’t afford it and low expectations.

I guess I should add at this point that had MFI not closed, I would have been very happy continuing to work for them until we could retire properly. I enjoyed the variety and the comradeship. It is a pity that when the new owners took over, nobody in senior management had the balls to tell them the truth. There was an opportunity there for the experience of the business to be used but it wasnt. I am sure that GF, CP and the like felt that they had all the answers and that we in the business must be wrong as the business wasnt working. Well no guys, the business had the answers but you were too stubborn to ask and the people who had your ears were too protective of their own position to tell you that you the emperors were walking round in the nude!! As for those who could, they didnt, did you Richard? Too busy preening and trying to look good. Yes sir no sir whereas it should have been think again. Those with balls who spoke up Adrian, Colin etc were moved on whilst you stood and watched, knowing you were accepting future failue. Your team were taken from you and in a show of solidarity you went and kissed the arses of the new guys

Still I expected no more, your stock answer to me was "you're not telling me what I want to hear" to which my response was " no but that's how it is. For someone who prides himself on his looks you too were wearing emperors clothes, and their transparency showed your lack of balls

To oversee a company closure is one thing, to oversee it again within 6 weeks of a prepack agreement is somewhat careless


As for J, she worked in a job she enjoyed with people she didn’t. Not sharing their love of drivel and reality TV nor her colleague “Ms I know everything” but can’t do f... all. Life’s hard when your cant have a telling conversation without having to wait for “ Me time” or “time out”. As is normally the case, the spoilt brat gets all the attention and everyone else has to walk on eggshells in case they start “Ms I know everything” off on one and once again she forgets what she should have learned at her anger management course had she not thought she knew it all before she went.
So a cafe it is, J is swapping her colleagues for me, look like Rene act like Basil Fawlty. We have never done anything like this before, never poured a pint, never made a sandwich to sell but we are game and WTF we’ll give it our best.


It is unbelievable many things pop into your head as you go about your daily business. Can you get them all written down? Are they relevant?
Loads of ideas as to what we could do with the cafe, what we could sell, how it could look and on top of this all the concerns keep rising to the surface. Can we actually do the job? Who will do what? How much French will I know by then and will it be enough?